Showing posts with label SB. Show all posts
Showing posts with label SB. Show all posts

Wednesday, October 18, 2017

Justice According To Vengeance: The Unravelling

The Toyota Corolla stood out like a sore thumb, or more like a shiny Schauss pink one. It was way past 2 a.m. and Apóngbòn Under Bridge isn’t the usual hanging out spot for blinging Toyotas, especially not at foolish-o’clock.
The driver brought the car to a stop just at the ascent to Èkó Bridge by a cluster of makeshift sheds that looked deserted. In the dark, two forms peeled themselves from the shadows and approached the car. The thugs wondered at the audacity of the person who had dared wander onto their territory without invitation.
One of the thugs went over to the driver’s side and grabbed the door handle, trying to force it open. When he couldn’t, he slammed the tire iron he had with him into the window in anger and it shattered. 
        “Ògbeni, cooperate, àbí you wan chop bullet!” the thug said to the driver, his voice hoarse like stones scraping over slate.
One by one, like moths drawn to a flame, more thugs slunk out of the shadows, surrounding the car and before long, there was more than a dozen of them.
The first thug thrust his gun in the driver’s face, ready to start spewing more threats. His gun stopped a hair’s breadth from the driver’s nose and they stared at each other for a few moments, one face registering a mixture of shock and fear, the other deadly calm and unflinching.
        “Kílónselè? What’s happening now?” one of the other thugs demanded, already impatient.
        “Ask him to bring out all his money.” another said.
        “Abeg give am bullet if he no wan cooperate jàre!” someone else said, slamming the metal rod he had in his hand on the side of the car and denting it.
        “Shey he get powder àbí booze?”
        “How much we fit get for the car? Na tear rubber!”
        “Commot am for the car before you shoot am oh, make him no dirty the seat.”
The gunman didn’t reply his cronies. He simply slid slowly to the ground with his free hand clutching his shirt over the bullet hole in his chest and his lifeless eyes forever frozen in their shocked mask.
It took a moment for the others to register what had just happened. Blame it on the rounds of weed they’d had earlier. Blame it on the excess Apeteshi they’d already consumed. Blame it on the fact that the script had never gone that way before. But that tiny bitty moment saw another three thugs hit the ground in quick succession. The others scattered then, scrambling for safety but not quite fast enough. Another one took a shot to the head and one in his kneecap. He dragged himself over a low barbed wire fence, screaming for his mates to help him. Of course, no one waited to offer any help.
The driver sat calmly in the car and watched them scamper away. With the same unhurried movements with which he’d shot at the thugs, he disconnected the silencer and put it and the Glock into the glove compartment. The whole thing had taken less than five minutes. He got out of the car and surveyed his handiwork. He took one disinterested look at the body lying about three feet in front of his car and blocking his path down the road.

As if nothing had happened at all, the night remained dark and quiet and not a soul stirred. Absently, he took out a pack of Mentos gum from his breast pocket and popped a couple into his mouth. He got back in the car and started up the engine, Jimi Hendrix’s Purple Haze starting to pour out of the speakers. He hummed under his breath as he cut the wheel all the way to the left. He drove on towards Ìgànmú, his front right tire narrowly missing the sprawled body in his path.


Now available on Amazon in Paperback and Kindle format, OkadaBooks, Book Depository, and other online stores.

Monday, October 16, 2017

Justice According To Vengeance: Simon's Story

Simon Bólárìnwá seems to have it all; wholesome good looks, a thriving business, his pick of Lagos’ most beautiful and intelligent women, and a luck that seems far from running out. Best of all, he has the love and adoration of Rèmí, his 10-year-old daughter, who is the nucleus of his entire world.
His perfect life is turned wrong-side-down when one chance encounter leaves him living his worst nightmares and embarking on a quest that is nothing short of crazy. It’s left to Ese, his best friend, to put a stop to the madness that ensues before it’s too late.

As the final showdown begins between Simon and the man who took everything from him, Ese is faced with some terrifying demons of her own. Will she be in time to save Simon before his crazy brand of justice destroys him?

Now available on Amazon in Paperback and Kindle format, OkadaBooks, Book Depository, and other online stores.

Monday, May 1, 2017

Princess Diaries: New Papa

Dear Mr. AJ, 
Hey SB,

First and foremost, I think congratulations are in order so from one Princess-Daddy to another, welcome to the club of the Elite! 
Thank you so much. This is indeed an elite club (this I’ve found out in the past weeks) not for the weak hearted!

I’m sure you know by now that this changes everything. From that first amazing moment you hold a Princess in your arms and look into that beautiful and seemingly helpless face, the power-shift happens and a new Boss takes over. 
Things have not only changed, I vaguely remember my life before the first beautiful Wednesday in November ’16. I wonder what I’d been doing and what my life even comprised of! Yep! That’s how much Oluwamayomikun took over! She was brought out immediately after delivery and handed to me. It took a lot to hold the tears, my eyeballs were just floating in tears. She was so tiny and big at the same time. Like, human beings come this tiny and don’t break?! And, wait! All of this was in The Mrs' womb? I’ve always said babies are not born beautiful, this one was an exception. I literally felt a tug and a squeeze on my heart, I ran out of breath just standing and looking at her and saying a prayer of gratitude to the Most High.

She will bring sunshine and colour and texture and flavour into your life and only then will you become aware of all the grey, flat plains that were in it before now (especially if you were a self-absorbed wuss like I was). You’ll be amazed at all you’ll learn from your tiny little tot, about life, about yourself, about mundane things you didn’t even know existed. Best of all, you’ll learn a new kind of loving, giving and receiving it. 
Colour and sunshine she did bring. Colour first though, never imagined a room could be so full or colours and not hurt the eyes, but The Mrs worked her magic and I absolutely love her room. It’s even comforting in itself. I’m sure you know how even watching a baby cry can be a beautiful experience! Sleeping, playing, crying, smiling, laughing, whatever she’s doing, she's just captivating. You know, saying I love her so much doesn’t even convey the feelings. I’m not sure anything I can say or do can fully express the depth of love I have for her. I’m just always in a state of 'what else can I do for her?', and how? Or when? Gosh! Someone said I’ve been softened. I scoffed to form macho, but me I know, I’ve become butter.

You’ll learn anew the meaning of vulnerability and how utterly beautiful and fulfilling it can be. You’ll discover the hero in you, not just for your Princess but for yourself. You’ll get more than just a few grey hairs (oh yes you will!) and come to see each one as a badge of honour that you’re immensely proud of.
Grey hairs! I have ‘em. I know exactly how many more strands I’ve gotten in my beard since November 2, ’16, and I’m immensely proud of every mm (if you guys do imperial, read: inches) of them.

Each day will bring its own little treasure and I wish I could possibly put to words all the wonder and adventures that await you but I couldn’t possibly do it if I tried. And even if I could, nothing, absolutely nothing can compare to actually unwrapping each precious treasure for yourself. You are in for a great ride my friend, congratulations! 
"Treasures in earthen vessels" has just been redefined for me. Each moment is a treasure in itself. Sometimes, I think I will pass out from being full of joy at the littlest things she does.  I’ve had my sleep cut drastically, I should be upset, yeah? Hell no! I wake up and wait for her to wake up so I can ‘rush’ to her room and bring her to The Mrs to nurse. Sometimes, I think I mentally wake her up sef :D This has to be the best ride life has to offer!

I know as the days roll into years, you’ll start to collect your own Princess-Diary memories. They will become some of your most prized possessions so treasure them, savour them, luxuriate in them. I hope that we can get to share our treasures with each other and I hope our precious Princesses get to know each other as well. 
I’ll confess this right now, I’ve never taken as many pictures of anyone as I have taken of Oluwamayomikun. Mostly solos of her, sometimes with dad selfie :D, or the whole (that sounds awesome) family ussie :D. Opened an email for her, I plan to leave emails now and then and milestones of her life. I’m like gathering every info and moments I can of her and trying to store them. Sometimes, I feel silly, but the good kind – not like there’s any other kind :D Absolutely looking forward to another ‘run in’ and sharing more of these moments, while watching our treasures play and probably do girl stuff.


Here’s Mayomikun in her car seat. I love that she loves being in the car seat, so we can easily hit town.

Till we meet again, probably in another dressing room with your little girl in tow, I remain yours’ Knightedly,
SB
I do have to run and get outta the office and head home to this awesome lil lady.

New Papa 

Sunday, February 5, 2017

Princess Diaries:Enraptured

Dear Mr. AJ,

First and foremost, I think congratulations are in order so from one Princess-Daddy to another, welcome to the club of the Elite!
I’m sure you know by now that this changes everything. From that first amazing moment you hold a Princess in your arms and look into that beautiful and seemingly helpless face, the power-shift happens and a new Boss takes over.
She will bring sunshine and colour and texture and flavour into your life and only then will you become aware of all the grey, flat plains that were in it before now (especially if you were a self-absorbed wuss like I was). You’ll be amazed at all you’ll learn from your tiny little tot, about life, about yourself, about mundane things you didn’t even know existed. Best of all, you’ll learn a new kind of loving, giving and receiving it.
You’ll learn anew the meaning of vulnerability and how utterly beautiful and fulfilling it can be. You’ll discover the hero in you, not just for your Princess but for yourself. You’ll get more than just a few grey hairs (oh yes you will!) and come to see each one as a badge of honour that you’re immensely proud of.
Each day will bring its own little treasure and I wish I could possibly put to words all the wonder and adventures that await you but I couldn’t possibly do it if I tried. And even if I could, nothing, absolutely nothing can compare to actually unwrapping each precious treasure for yourself. You are in for a great ride my friend, congratulations!
I know as the days roll into years, you’ll start to collect your own Princess-Diary memories. They will become some of your most prized possessions so treasure them, savour them, luxuriate in them. I hope that we can get to share our treasures with each other and I hope our precious Princesses get to know each other as well.
Till we meet again, probably in another dressing room with your little girl in tow, I remain yours’ Knightedly,
SB

Monday, August 1, 2016

Meetings and Dressing Rooms

          “Mr. AJ, what do you think?”
He looked up from his phone at the yellow dress with multi-coloured stones on the neck line.
        “This shade matches my complexion better and I just love how it flows easily without too much drama, simple and elegant!” Mrs. AJ was saying.
She made a half turn and smoothed her hands over her hips, arching her neck to see the back. He opened his mouth and then shut it again, wondering if he was actually expected to give an answer. Truth be told, he couldn’t see how this shade of yellow was different from the last one she'd tried on.
        “What do you think?” she asked again, still inspecting herself.
He didn’t mind going shopping with the Mrs (well not too much) as long as he wasn’t expected to know the entire colour spectrum or which style fit which body shape or any of the other weird things women worried about.
        “Err…well, I think it’s okay.” He replied.
She paused her inspection to stare at him.
        “Just okay?” she asked, arms now akimbo.
        “Well…it’s okay…I mean it’s good!” he floundered. What was he supposed to say, that it wasn’t an okay dress?!
She shook her head at him, giving him her signature look and went back into the changing room.
What did I do now!
        “Never ever describe a woman as okay.
        “Sorry?”
        “You’ll never live that mistake down.”
He vaguely recognized the guy who’d spoken to him. He’d seen him around earlier that day at Ikeja City Mall, first at Mango and probably at MRP as well. The guy seemed to be in the same shoes as he was, tagging along with a woman on a shopping spree. Unlike him though, the guy looked unruffled and had the sort of confident poise that could only come from several years of experience.
        “But I said it looked good!” Mr. AJ replied defensively and his new friend tsked.
        “That’s even worse.” He said, juggling several carrier bags from one hand to the other. “Common rookie mistake.”
        “But it was a nice dress!” Mr. AJ spluttered.
        “Another forbidden word.” He said with a shake of his head. “I have a twelve year old so I’ve been in this business long enough!”
Mr AJ raised an eyebrow. How can he possibly compare shopping with a twelve year old to shopping with a grown woman!
        “As a rule, everything is beautiful or stunning or dashing or amazing.” He said. “Sometimes, they’ll take pretty but that one is a bit dicey. You should read the situation before dishing that one out.”
Say what!
        “If you’re ever caught off guards and can’t think of an appropriate word quick enough, just go for ‘Wow’”
        “O…kay…
        “Trust me on this one.”
        “But what if the dress looks hideous on her!”
        “Diplomacy, my friend. You think the politicians are the ones with the tough jobs?”
        “Omo mehn!”
        “Rule number two: it’s always the fault of the dress. The colour doesn’t flatter her eyes. Who made that dress, a carpenter? That dress isn’t doing your amazing figure enough justice. Catch my drift?”
        “How do you even wrap your head around all that colour shade and style nonsense?!” Mr. AJ asked in exasperation.
        “Take it from the man who had to hunt down a Barbie Pink Mac Book Air, you learn!”
Just then, the door to one of the dressing rooms banged open and a girl who could have easily passed for sixteen flounced out, clad in a pair of pencil jeans, a silk shirt and Louboutin's.
        “Daddy, how about this?” she asked, arms on her hips.
        “Wow, look at my little Princess! I think it’s perfect!”
        “Really?” the girl asked uncertainly. “I’m not so sure of the shirt. I think peach will go better with my new purse.” She said pulling at the shirt at the edges as if that would miraculously change its colour.
        “Peach? But this one…”
        “I just knew beige would be too far off. I’ll go ask them if they have this style in Peach. If they don't, we'll have to go somewhere else.” She said going back into the dressing room.
        “Rule number three: sometimes, even saying the right things doesn’t work.” Simon said on a resigned sigh.
        “You could say that again!” Mr. AJ replied. “By the way, I’m Mayowa.” He said closing the distance between them and proffering his hand.
        “I’m Simon, but everyone calls me SB.” Simon said juggling the shopping bags again to shake his hand.
        “SB?” Moyowa asked.
        “Oh yeah, my initials. I can’t really remember how it started but at some point, even my little girl called me that.”
        “Oh well, SB it is then!” Mayowa said smiling.
        “Nice meeting you.” Simon said returning his smile.
        “Pleasure’s all mine!”
        “Mr. AJ, what of this one?” the Mrs said, coming out of the dressing room again. This time, she was wearing an A-cut midnight blue dress with a high neck  which stopped just above the knees.
        “Oh wow!” Mayowa gasped. “It’s….wow!”
The Mrs beamed from ear to ear and Simon turned away to hide his smile.

*Thanks a million Mayowa and SB for giving me permission to share your story. I love you both specially!!! :*

Monday, May 30, 2016

Dreamscapes


Had a dream last night (or was it this morning?) that I was taking a shower. Then my alarm went off and I woke up and turned it off and went back to sleep so I could finish up my shower on time. So you can understand how really upset I was because I was still late to work.
        “What happened to you?” my colleague asked when I finally made it in.
What was I supposed to say? I overslept or over-eager killed me?
        “It was traffic.” I said lamely. Well, the traffic was definitely part of it.
        “Well, you can tell that to SB oh!” was the retort I got in reply.
        “What, you go to the Boss simply because I’m half an hour late!”
        “Forty-five minutes. And he asked for you.”
        “Just great!”
        “The earlier you speak with him, the better. You know how he hates to be kept waiting.”
I come in late once and I still manage to get in trouble with the man at the top himself. And to think he isn’t even around oh! It had to be the middle of the night in Bangkok where he was at the moment, did the man not sleep at all? Well, dumb question, the man is a machine!
As if to buttress her point, my phone started to blink like a demented doll. I stared at it in horror as several messages came in in rapid succession. From the time stamps, they had started to come in from about 7:30 this morning, only that my stupid network had somehow left them hovering somewhere, somehow! And of course they were all from SB himself.
Just in case you’re wondering, SB is short for Simon Bolarinwa and he is the Boss Man. Everyone refers to the guy reverently as SB and believe me, he is someone you don’t want to mess with.
        “Are you going to call him or what!” she asked.
Easy for you to say!
I took a deep breath and dialled his number, which he was roaming of course. God forbid that the world comes to a grinding halt simply because he is unreachable! It started to ring and just when I was about to heave a sigh of relief that he’d finally gone to bed and I would be able to postpone the moment when the shit hit the fan, he picked the call.
        “Good Morning Sir!” I said, trying to sound sharp and alert. He had that effect on people, even from thousands of miles away.
        “I am still awaiting your report on the Conocco deal.” He started without preamble. And he didn’t even have the decency to sound tired or sleepy.
        “Yes Sir, I still haven’t received their feedback yet.”
        “And you’re telling me this because?”
        “Well…I…I…”
        “Send me an official report now.”
        “Yes Sir, I…”
        “And why haven’t you replied any of my messages?”
        “I haven’t yet…”
        “Please read your messages and respond accordingly.”
        “Yes I…”
The phone went dead. kai, and he didn’t even mention the coming late thing. Of course now I have something to stew over for the next few days, knowing it would come but never knowing just when exactly.
Sha, sha, that’s how I started this Monday morning oh, God only knows how the rest of the week will pan out with such a start, and to think that it’s a new month tomorrow, I can’t start on a jinx abeg!
At some point, after talking my head off on the phone, trying to chase down the contact person at Conocco, I unglued my backside from my seat and went to the bathroom (somewhere at the back of my mind was the fact that I hadn’t read or replied to SB’s messages yet, God help me). The woman I saw staring back at me in the mirror had me cringing. I was having the equivalent of a bad-hair-day for bad hair days! I looked like a real mess and I felt worse.
Well, suck it up and grow some brass balls instead of complaining. That’s one of the more famous lines by the king of one liners himself. With that, I took a deep breath, squared my shoulders and went to plough through my day with my hair sticking all over the place and my unevenly drawn eyebrows that looked like they belonged on the cookie monster (yeah, it really was that kind of day today).
When I was finally leaving work, my phone rang (for the millionth time) and it was the Boss, again. I braced myself as I picked the call. He still hadn’t said anything about the late coming, plus there were like a million reasons he could find to give me a tongue scalding, or he could just do it because because.
        “Hello.”
        “Hi. Good job on Conocco today.”
Huh?! Did he just…
        “I’m pleased with how you handled it, well done.”
        “Wow…err…thank you!” I sputtered.
        “Now go on and make sure you enjoy the rest of your Birthday.” He said. “Many Happy Returns.”
Awwww bless, he remembered! No one else at work did. Well, in all fairness, he is my uncle so he had better remember. Wait, did I forget to mention that part? Well yeah, the crazy slave driver is my uncle. Lucky me, eh?
        “Just don’t party too hard and then turn up late for work again.”
Damn, I should have known I would never get away with that!
Oh well, Happy Birthday to Me!!!!!!! ;D